Counselling Children
Compare and contrast two models of counselling and assess their relevance to a
particular counselling setting.
INTRODUCTION
When counselling children it is necessary to use the correct approach and have the
right setting. There are many models of counselling that can be used with young
people with a positive effect. Therefore it helps to understand what model might not
work with a certain child or in a certain setting. It is beneficial to use the most
appropriate counselling model when a child comes for help. An awareness of this is
necessary in order for the child to receive the most appropriate support. The setting is
equally important to ...view middle of the document...
The young people I will write about are young carers, and have since moved on.
PERSON CENTRED COUNSELLING
Carl Rogers was the originator of Client Centred Therapy. Rogers regarded the three
core conditions of empathy, unconditional positive regard and congruence as
“necessary and sufficient for therapeutic change†(Rogers, 1957)
How many people including children act in such a way that is completely true to
themselves? To behave freely without worrying that they might be upsetting others?
Most of us strive to please others and will act in ways, at times we are not happy or
comfortable with in order to gain approval from others around us. E.g. our boss,
parents, peers, teachers. Rogers states that:
“It seems to me that at bottom each person is asking, “who am really?
how can I get in touch with this real self, underlying all my surface
behaviour? how can I become myself?†Carl Rogers
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Self-actualisation is realising ones full potential and is top of Maslows
“Hierarchy of needsâ€. Rogers defines this as
“the highest human motivation, the need to fulfil one’s own
individual potential†Carl Rogers, resource material, cosca.
It is through this process a child will develop a self concept, the “I†or the
“me†of experience.
In order for a child to have a positive self concept they need to be shown
positive regard from significant others in their developing stages. Children
strive for approval and praise from parents and if shown consistent positive
regard in any situation they will develop a healthy self concept and will
believe in themselves as worthwhile people, able to make decisions without
the worry of disapproval and will trust their own judgements.
Children who are not shown positive regard from parents will still strive for
praise and even love and these basic needs will force them to behave in such a
way to attract positive regard from parents. Example of this is a child who
comes from a musical family and takes up the violin to please them but who
would rather have an electric guitar. Rogers refers to these as “conditions of
worthâ€.
A person who has grown up trying to live up to others expectations and values
is not being true to himself or herself and their experience of life and their self
concept do not match. Rogers refers to this as “incongruenceâ€.
“Incongruence implies that a self-conception is based on a condition of
worth rather than on the organism’s own valuing processâ€.
(Richard Nelson Jones: p.93)
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The three core conditions of person centred counselling are:
Empathy - This is being able to enter the client’s own world by stepping into
their shoes and being with them from moment to moment. By reflecting back
what the client has said and staying with them at their own pace. Rogers
describes empathy as:
“entering the private perceptual world of the other...