Review of confronting conflict - Liberty University
A 4-MAT Review System: Confronting Without Offending: Positive and Practical Steps to
December 1, 2013
LEAD 610- DO2 LUO
A 4-MAT Review System: Confronting Without Offending: Positive and Practical Steps to Resolving Conflict.
Confronting without defending is a very insightful book. Right from the beginning it allowed me to see communication and confrontation in the way the lord sees it. It begins by telling the story of the Tower of Babel. I thought it was extremely interesting how it speaks about ...view middle of the document...
Deborah does a great job in explaining and breaking down the steps to have an effective confrontation. It is so easily written, making it easily understood as the reader. I want to focus the rest of my abstract in Part 3 because I feel it’s the most essential part of the book. The reason the book was created to begin with. Preparing for the encounter is exactly what that section speaks about; preparation, time, place, anger management. It deals mainly with self and planning. Owning the problem on the other hand, is when the process starts. This is when you take ownership of how you are feeling and have the chance to express it with the person you are confronting. Always be direct and say, “ I “ felt like … Take responsibility for your downline even if you don’t like or agree with it as King Ashish had to do with David. It’s amazing how the lord continued to save David. Another story, I was unfamiliar with. Speaking the right words and listening are the two most important steps. Why? We all know that we can say something, mean it in a good way, but if our delivery is all wrong, than nothing good would be received from the message. Great versed used to describe this on (Pegues, 2009, p.75)
“The Lord God has given ME the tongue of the learned,
That I should know how to speak a word in season to him who is weary,
He awakens ME morning by morning,
He awakens MY ear to hear as the learned.”
God has a way of bringing peace and unity in a time of great need. This is the time where seeking his guidance and asking for the right words come into play. By saying the right things in the right way and listening to how it was reciprocated will be the defined moment on whether the confrontation was a success, not a success, or your message needs to be refined. Overall, Confronting without Offending was a good book to learn, analyze, and most of all applied literature.
This book triggered quit a few memories. The one I want to speak about is one with my brother. We both are dictators, we think we know it all, know what’s best for one another, etc. See the problem is that we don’t know how to execute those concerns or solutions to one another. For example, something not too serious like weight loss. I believe that we have to find a way is healthy, livable, and not deprived. He believes in more extreme ways, such as, crazy exercises, out of the normal meal plans, and protein shakes. When we speak about this subject, despite the fact that we both mean well, it is delivered poorly. He gets frustrated because he believes that I do not understand what he’s saying and I get frustrated because I believe the same with him. See when none of us are welling to budge then the conversation comes to a halt, ends, and nothing is received from either side.
I know understand that by listening more and taking the time to plan my execution he would have seen better where my point of view is coming from. Maybe...