Carpe Diem. It could be known as a cliché or an actual philosophy to live by. I choose the latter. “Seize the day” means to live every day as if you had suddenly run out of them. If you were to go right now, would you be happy with your final day? To me, carpe diem is a philosophy that is underused. Though it is said often, not many people sincerely follow through. I believe in carpe diem, for we never know when the end is coming.
I remember when I first started believing in this philosophy. Usually people form large beliefs when a cataclysmic event takes place. Mine was nothing short of that. The bubble on my arm had come back positive. It was slightly painful, popping out of my arm like a gumball, except itchy and red accompanied by a burning sensation. I had no clue as to what it meant, but I knew it ...view middle of the document...
When I left the TB unit, I had my new medicine in tow. It would take 9 months to eradicate the infection, but it was better than letting it progress. I didn’t know that in 24 hours, my life would take a frightening spin.
I took my medicine an hour before getting into my costume for the school play. I was nervous to get on stage, but time waits for no one and soon I was delivering my lines. It seemed as if the stage lights were getting more intense as I tried to continue talking. Soon, I was no longer in my own body. I was shaking so hard and my head was hitting the wooden floor of the set. The audience reacted as soon as it happened, but at the moment, I couldn’t see or hear. I might have been screaming, I don’t know, but my body wasn’t mine anymore, it was a shell that was just convulsing like a fish out of water.
The twitching eventually slowed down when I made it to the ER. They checked my medicine bottles and sure enough, seizures were a side effect. My body was weak from the intense shaking, and my tongue hurt—I had bitten through. I remembered the panic of not being inside my own body and I thought I had died. It was only a seizure, but it was that cataclysmic event.
I was so thankful it had stopped, and it felt like my second chance to live. I had gotten a new medication that would get rid of the infection in only 6 months in lieu of 9. With this experience, I found myself wanting to do everything. I wanted carpe diem, to make every day my own and live how I wanted. I wanted to go out with friends and do hobbies I loved; to enrich myself. I did not want to let that moment define me, I wanted to come back stronger. I believe I did.
One day, I will leave my body and never come back. However, it wasn’t that day and it won’t be anytime soon. All I really want is to be happy, and when death comes, I want to die happy. Carpe diem is living how you want to live, and if it’s your time, you’ll have no objections.